I'm thrilled to announce that The Heart's History has been included on the list of Best LGBT Books of 2012, according to the Band of Thebes blog.  The novel was nominated by Jeff Mann, author of Purgatory and Binding the God. 

All the titles on the list are selected by other writers, so it's kind of like our version of the Academy Awards--an acknowledgment from your peers.  It's also a great way to find out what's out there:  it's already inspired me to add a stack of books to my must-read list. 

I had a fantastic time at my reading at Books Inc. in San Francisco this past Thursday.  A wonderful evening with friends old and new.  The Q&A, as always, was my favorite part.  Some of the questions really took me by surprise.  Where exactly did the character of Harlan come from?  Hmmm....

The Community's History

This afternoon I was privileged to spend a couple of hours with a wonderful group of gay seniors.  Openhouse, a San Francisco organization devoted to providing housing and community for LGBT seniors, invited me to read from my novel and lead a discussion. 

Every second Sunday, the group meets for a potluck lunch and open discussion on a particular topic.  Today, about 10 men participated.  As soon as I walked through the doors, I was made to feel at home.  We sat in a circle and I read a couple of passages from The Heart’s History, which sparked a lively conversation about what it means to be gay in the contemporary world.  I was particularly pleased to have a chance to discuss the topic with men from an older generation, many of whom had come out in the 1970s, or even the 1960s.  The characters in The Heart’s History—not to mention its author—have the luxury of being able to argue about gay culture and the degree to which it can or should assimilate into the mainstream.  For people of an earlier generation, coming out of the closet or holding your lover’s hand in public was an act of courage. 

We talked a lot about how to define sexual orientation:  Is it about sex?  An ability to memorize lines from Joan Crawford movies?  One person summarized it simply:  Gay people are survivors.  We keep living out loud and fighting for our rights, despite the odds.

And that got me thinking.  No matter what the Far Right wishes, or how hard they may try, they’ll never get rid of us, because you don’t need gay people to make more gay people.  We don’t have to reproduce ourselves, and we don’t have to recruit.  Straight people take care of that for us.  Mother Nature must know something that the homophobes don’t.  She knows that we’re an essential part of the fabric of humanity. 

Sitting with these men who paved the way for me, as an earlier generation paved the way for them, I was acutely aware of how essential our history is to all of us.  Ours is indeed a history of the heart.  And lest we lose sight of that, as each generation is wont to do, I saw this afternoon that there are some ways in which I simply can’t compete.  I met a man today who once had sex in a bathhouse with Michel Foucault.  Now that’s history.

Publishers Weekly Review

The Heart’s History was recently reviewed in Publishers Weekly—a first for me!  PW is a major resource for bookstores in selecting the books to put on their shelves.  (I’m sure that would mean more if half the bookstores in the world hadn’t vanished in recent years!)  It must mean something, because my publisher is reissuing the book to include the review on the cover.  Here’s a sneak peek for you:

DeSimone's second novel (after Chemistry) is a thoughtful and engaging examination of contemporary gay life and love. When Edward, a 35-year-old Boston architect, introduces his new boyfriend, Robert, to his tight-knit circle of longtime friends, none of Edward's cohort expects the relationship to last--Edward has an abysmal romantic track record, and the generational differences between the two (Robert is 10 years Edward's junior) manifest in the ways each man navigates their relationship; Edward remembers "the romance of secrecy" when homosexuality was still a taboo, whereas Robert and his generation "openly proclaimed their right[s]." Soon, Edward tests positive for AIDS, and his body fails to respond to treatment. Set against the backdrop of Edward's illness, the next four years sees various friends and former lovers embrace their individual connections to Edward while discussing the opportunities and challenges of monogamy, polyandry, safe sex, gay/straight relationships, and sexual politics. DeSimone's facility with the minutiae of everyday life and the rhythms of friendship brings depth to this timely story of ordinary individuals struggling to bulwark their ideas of love against shifting personal and cultural tides.

BTYBNBKKDTBP

Post-partum Anxiety

Now comes the hard part.  The Heart’s History is officially out there—no more edits, no more opportunities to stuff it back into a drawer while I rethink the whole thing.  All I can do now is sit back and hope people like it.

I don’t remember if I felt this way the first time, when Chemistry came out.  Maybe publishing a book is like childbirth: if you could remember the pain, you'd never do it again.  And so I just keep my fingers crossed as my baby takes its first steps without me, praying my parenting was sufficient to prepare it for the world.

Rumor has it that even Madonna has stage fright.  So I’m in good company when my stomach churns at the thought of publicity, or opening a Website where a review of the book might be lurking.  It’s ironic, really:  the very word publish means “to make public.”  If I’m so worried about what people are going to think, then what am I doing in this situation in the first place?  It’s not as if somebody held me at gunpoint and forced me to publish my work.

Madonna, of course, makes millions from her work:  with that kind of motivation, stage fright should be an easy opponent.  Most writers, however, don’t really do it for the money.  Okay, maybe we do it for the dream of money, but all the people I know who’ve struck it rich from their writing could fit comfortably into my coat closet. 

In the end, the cliché is true:  writing, like every art, is ultimately about self-expression.  Sure, I could keep everything in that overstuffed drawer, but once in a while, it’s nice to let some of it out.  And sometimes there are unexpected benefits:  The most gratifying thing about publishing Chemistry was hearing from readers who had loved ones suffering from mental illness; reading the book allowed them to open up about their own experiences. 

And so the latest one has left the nest.  I’ll just sit here and resist the urge to rush over whenever he stumbles and hope he doesn’t spit up on anyone.

Michael Montlack on The Heart’s History

Poet Michael Montlack and I met a few years ago, when we were both Fellows at the inaugural Lambda Writers Retreat. Sometime later, Michael edited a wonderful anthology entitled My Diva: 65 Gay Men on the Women Who Inspire Them, in which my essay on the indomitable Auntie Mame stood beside the work of such illustrious writers as Mark Doty, Wayne Koestenbaum, and Mark Wunderlich. Michael recently published a sequel, Divining Divas, which explores similar relationships through poetry rather than prose. Somewhere in his busy schedule, he found time to share some lovely words on The Heart’s History:

"Yes, times are changing and for the better. But even with the legalization of gay marriage in Massachusetts, the circle of friends at the center of The Heart's History finds that 'nothing was easy anymore. Everything had something attached to it. There was history behind it all.' Edward has finally found love in a younger man just before realizing he contracted HIV from a previous lover. Harlan dodges his pals' meddling matchmaking, unsure if he even wants to settle down. And Kyle treats his best girlfriend like a partner because Edward will never be more than his friend. Even the giddy newlyweds Greg and Victor have to navigate a future with no precedents, no former generations to act as guides. In a crisp panoramic prose, with each chapter smoothly changing point of view, Lewis DeSimone shows this circle stumbling and dancing toward middle age with more and more questions about everything from politics, marriage, and parenting, to suburbia, open relationships, and grief. There are no answers, though DeSimone offers plenty of sharp humor and insight, as well as the consolation that friends have each other to lean on, their own history to write and remember. The Heart's History invites you to become part of this circle, and in it you will see (and probably better understand) your own circle too."